How A Giraffe Led Me To The World’s Sexiest Toilet Paper

Posted on November 19th, 2013 by Jean

My youngest daughter and I were recently browsing giraffe photos (yes, because of that Facebook riddle), when we spied these amazing photos of Giraffe Manor.

Giraffe Manor

Incredible, right? The Giraffe Manor website, which has since been redesigned, sucked us in. We couldn’t get enough! At that time, they offered a  Virtual Tour (access has been removed from their site, but I’m sharing the direct link). Each room in the manor is beautifully decorated; suites named Betty, Marlon, Jock and Karen epitomize luxury & opulence.

In Betty’s bathroom, we spied something most peculiar, most desirable. Can you see it?

Bettys Bathroom collage

Up until that moment, we had no idea black toilet paper even existed. Thus began our quest for the black toilet paper!

Renova colorsRENOVA are the makers of the World’s Sexiest Toilet Paper… no lie! Created in Portugal, this luxury item is used by celebs Simon Cowell and Kris Kardashian. The colors aren’t the only stand-out feature of this paper. It is also triple-ply!

I found it. Now, how to get it? Shipping fees from Portugal are high (outrageously so).  At $4.00 per roll before shipping, I couldn’t afford an industrial supply.

Bravo’s Shah’s of Sunset were having a contest on Facebook, “Overstated Is Underrated”. They asked viewers to pose with something plain that could use an overstated upgrade. Most posed with rings, shoes, and purses. Not me. I posed with a roll of white toilet paper pressed against my cheek. My face cheek! Good Lord!

My entry was accepted, but I didn’t win. On with my quest to obtain the black, sexy, toilet paper. How sexy would my bathroom look? How much would the triple-ply protect my hand? I had to know!

Thank you ebay: 2 weeks and $14.75 later, the sexy t.p. arrived.  I was out at the time. Tom texted me a photo of our eldest daughter holding the t.p. I warned them not to use it, but they replied, “Too late”.

Too late?! Really?!

Thankfully, they were kidding. I was able to hold my delivery, take photos of our new arrival, scan the QR code, slice open the package, inhale the floral scent, feel the….. okay, it feels like a napkin. Not soft, not quilted. Don’t get me wrong. We still are using it (still on our first roll), and yes it is some damn fine (sexy?) paper, but I wouldn’t order it again. My quest was fulfilled, and it was fun.

black tp collage

• Would you buy, use, or give the gift of colorful toilet paper?

Jean photo B16123E10292F5D0137E3C112C0110E4_zpsa65858d2.png

21 Responses to "How A Giraffe Led Me To The World’s Sexiest Toilet Paper"

  1. OMG! Who knew!? I love your stories Jean, they always have an interesting twist. Congrats on your entry being accepted! Wish you would have won!

    I probably would never purchase colored paper unless Charmin or Cottonelle began selling it. Especially, since you said it feels like a napkin! I really have spoiled myself with the moist wipes though!
    Sherri @ The Kitchen Prescription recently posted..Rosemary Parmesan Bread

    [Reply]

    Jean Reply:

    Thanks, Sherri!
    I wish I would have won too. Bet those Shahs would have sent me a butt-load (no pun intended). LOL!
    I have a hard time even blowing my nose with this black tp. The texture is odd.
    Moist wipes! Hmmm…. may have to try those! Thanks for the tip!

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  2. You went from Giraffe Manor to toilet paper?
    No wonder I enjoy reading your blogs, haha!
    I like the toilet paper that looks like money.

    [Reply]

    Jean Reply:

    See how I did that? LOL! This has to be the ultimate shopping story.
    Thanks, Lee! I enjoy reading your blogs too. I need to swing over and comment on how you nearly blew off your hand with your first gun. Geez!

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  3. OMG, I LOVE this post, Jean!!!!

    I clicked over on the Virtual Tour and had a blast looking at all the various rooms. And btw, I adore giraffe’s because they have the most precious face! And WOW…what a stunning place that Manor is!

    “Not me. I posed with a roll of white toilet paper pressed against my cheek. My face cheek! Good Lord!”

    Bwhahahahhaha! I wish I had seen the photo of you because that’s sounds like something I would do.

    Love all the colorful toilet paper Renova offers. I had no idea tp like that even existed?!? I’m kinda boring when it comes to tp, I use plain old Scotts.

    And speaking of ‘rough’ tp, the roughest tp I have ever used was when I lived in Europe (Amsterdam) for a summer. OMG..their tp feels like sandpaper, I kid you not!

    Fabulously funny and informative post, Jean!

    Loved it!
    Ron recently posted..My New Zazzle 2014 Calendar

    [Reply]

    Jean Reply:

    Thank you, Ron!! I’m so glad you clicked on the virtual tour! Sounds like you were as enthralled as we were. Giraffe’s are so darling.

    Your selfies are way better than mine, and I can picture you with a roll pressed to your cheek too! LOL!

    I can’t believe those Europeans haven’t figured out soft tp. Ouch!!

    Thank you so much. I love it when you stop by.

    [Reply]

    Ron Reply:

    Hi Jean!

    Just wanted to stop by to wish you and your family a Happy Thanksgiving tomorrow!

    Have an awesome day, my friend!
    Ron recently posted..On Giving Thanks To Age

    [Reply]

  4. Too funny….from giraffes to colored toilet paper. I think I’ll stick with my Quilted Northern…easy on my budget and bum :-)
    Ingrid recently posted..Oh, yeah….Happy Hour!

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    Jean Reply:

    Quilted Northern, ahhhhh yes!

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  5. i want to go to giraffe manor!!!
    catherine gacad recently posted..Emergency Room

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    Jean Reply:

    Me too, Catherine! :-)

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  6. i thought it was the reflection in the mirror making it look black! regardless, black toilet paper is very chic! i remember when toilet paper was colored as a kid!
    elle sees recently posted..What’s New at the Drugstore? Fall Haul! Video!

    [Reply]

    Jean Reply:

    Hi Elle! There was colored tp when you were little? I was oblivious!
    Loving your pics of Charlie Brown. My daughters always want to see him too.
    Happy Holidays!

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  7. I am so glad you posted this! I was dying to know when you posted the photo of the black toilet paper … what an awesome story that led you to this :) PS – I want to go to Giraffe Manor too!
    Angie recently posted..The Switch Witch is Coming…

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    Jean Reply:

    Angie, thank you for coming by to learn about the black tp! LOL! Glad I didn’t disappoint. Happy Holidays!

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  8. First of all, I want to go to Giraffe Manor!! So awesome :-) And of course second, THAT TOILET PAPER! I bought pink toilet paper once (it was a breast cancer fundraiser) and it was just the coolest. Black would be even cooler.
    Jayda recently posted..Randomosity and Lipstick

    [Reply]

    Jean Reply:

    I want to go to Giraffe Manor too! What an insanely cool place!
    Pink toilet paper would be so pretty!
    Sorry I haven’t been around lately, but I’ll be right over!

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  9. Haha! How fun! I love that you made such an effort to find it! What a fun story!
    Rach recently posted..Bringing Italy to our Christmas Tree

    [Reply]

    Jean Reply:

    Thank you, Rach! Sorry for my recent absence. I’ll be right over! :-D

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  10. This design is incredible! You most certainly know how to keep a reader amused.

    Between your wit and your videos, I was almost moved to start my own blog (well,
    almost…HaHa!) Excellent job. I really loved what you
    had to say, and more than that, how you presented it.
    Too cool!
    eric gray buffalo ny recently posted..eric gray buffalo ny

    [Reply]

    Jean Reply:

    Thanks, Eric! You DO have your own blog. Congrats on baby Gray’s imminent arrival.

    [Reply]

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