Friday Flip Offs

Posted on August 27th, 2010 by Jean

Friday Flip Offs is the brainchild of my friend, Kludgy Mom. It’s my pleasure to take part this week.
To my husband, flip off! I can no longer store the cocktail glasses you are intent on collecting from casinos. Our cabinets overfloweth. Did we really need the complete set of Fat Tire glasses? Or the Dos Equis ones? We don’t even drink those beers!
To my housekeeper, flip off! That might seem insensitive, especially since you are recovering from a heart attack, but why can’t you return my calls? I am calling to see how you are doing, not to lament over my filthy house. Are you feeling better? Put your feet up. (Call me.)
To the lady in line behind me yesterday at The Cupcakery, flip off! I wanted to try that orange julius variety, but not after you told everyone (ok, maybe just your friend) how disgusting the flavor was, and how it didn’t sit right with you. I couldn’t bring myself to order it with you eavesdropping behind me.
To the sudden burst of wind and rain in Vegas yesterday, flip off! My gawd, couldn’t you see I just had my hair done? You tousled it every which way and back. Not to mention the show you forced me to give as you got all up in my wrap-around dress. Geez Louise, you suck.
• Who or what are you flipping off today?